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-I watched this TV program when I was in orbit in the shuttle before, says Daniel, it was about women who buy things with coupons, they could enter the store and buy merchandise for $1134 and 43 cents, £825 and with coupons they only paid $1 and 97 cents, less than £2. And they had a spare room in their home or in the basement with merchandise they had bought worth $15 000, £11000 and only paid $100, £73, for it with coupons. They had 112 bottles of instant coffee, 112 packages of tea, 98 jars of canned fruit, a staggering 278 tubes of toothpaste, 155 chocolate bars, 48 toothbrushes, 55 packages of washing powder and so on. And the woman took her teenage daughters to the store and the mother said to them: You should first destroy all men and then get coupons, and then in the year 2025 we will have a planet with only women and coupons, the woman proclaimed.

There is a complete silence in the car.

-Yes, while you have watched TV and apparently been hallucinating, says Eliza, we women have planned the expedition.

-The woman in the program could refurbish her home for $6500, £4700 after saving money on coupons, says Daniel. She fixed the roof and kitchen and bought furniture, a new desk, a chair and a table in fake oak.

Eliza then continues with a tirade.

-Yes, women are good at economy, says Eliza, that’s why they take care of the domestic budget, because men only spend and spend with money they don’t have, and it never ends! It only gets worse and then disaster! Screams Eliza

There is a telling silence in the car.

-I’m sorry, I’m ok now, says Eliza.

-Maybe we should stop here for a while and get something to drink and eat, says Jennifer.

*******************

The car is standing on the surface of the moon 300 kilometres away from the place where the time zone was discovered. The crew are having cupcakes and coffee and tea.

Daniel’s cell phone is signalling.

-I’m not answering, says Daniel.

-Answer it, says Eliza.

Daniel takes the phone.

-Yes, says Daniel and then listens to the call.

-Its Jennifer’s husband, says the man, I don’t know who you are but I’m sure I don’t like you, can I talk to Jennifer now?

-You be nice to her, says Daniel.

-I’m always nice to her, says the man, or do you suggest I’m not? I call again.

-No, I want friendly calls, says Daniel, but the man has already closed the call.

-Jennifer, can you tell your husband I want friendly calls, says Daniel, how did he get my number?

-All I can say is that my husband can find people where ever they hide, says Jennifer.

**************************

The car is nearing a huge dust cloud that suddenly appears in front of them, it’s almost like a blizzard.

-We have to stop the car here, says Rihanna, we should put on a jacket it could be freezing.

Daniel puts on his jacket, its “No jacket required” printed on it.

Jennifer can’t help giving the jacket a glance.

-Where did you buy that? says Jennifer, on a 1980s sale or what? And the same jeans like always, and those shoes, can’t you have shoes that aren’t torn? And why don’t you have a haircut? Do you have be so shabby?

-I think I should have stayed in the ship instead, says Daniel.

-Do you know why you don’t have any friends, says Jennifer, it’s because you don’t have any personality.

-Can I talk to someone who is not yelling at me, please, says Daniel.

-If I can interrupt here, says Rihanna, we have to talk to the computer if we should continue or go back again.

**********************

Scarlett the girl has to be in the front of the car and Scarlett in the last seat away from each other so they don’t touch by mistake, it could mean that the whole universe falls apart.

Zara has something to say to Daniel.

-Are you going to hit me, says Daniel.

-No, I heard from Rihanna that you sometimes listen to Phil Collins, says Zara, well, no one is perfect.

-I have nothing against Phil Collins, says Daniel.

-No, he is ok, says Zara.

Marina then says that she and the whole crew have been suspecting something.

-Are you easily bored, says Marina, do you get angry for no reason? Do you have a shallow emotional state? Do you cheat, swindle and harass people? You never feel regret for what you have done?

-What do you mean, says Daniel, I’m not a psychopath.

-No, I just wanted to be sure, says Marina.

*******************************

Lindsay, Katy and Lily are talking to the computer on the ship.

-You have to stay where you are for at least 5 hours, says the computer, the dust cloud will stay in the area for a while.

-What should we do for five hours, says Lindsay.

-I brought a TV, says Daniel, we can watch Garage Gold.

*****************************

Rihanna then gets a message from the computer and she tells all in the car about it.

-Apparently, when we reach the time zone Daniel must enter the zone by himself, says Rihanna. We can’t follow him.

-Is it like a canary in a coal mine, says Daniel. You know 150 years ago in the coal mine they brought a canary bird with them to warn them from toxic fumes and lack of oxygen in the mine.

-We can’t let you go there, says Rihanna, I’m worried.

**************************

-How is your illness, says Eliza.

-I’m having dialyses at home in a few weeks, says Daniel, hopefully without problems.

To be continued

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Happy Birthday Rihanna

From the album Protection UK 2X Platinum